What starts as a diversion, quickly cascades, morphing into something you cannot recognize nor do you want ownership of. Years ago there were neighborhood kids who lived for the next lie, watching as it unfolded, causing pain to those involved and to unsuspecting by-standers. Here we are in 2014 and some of those traits are still there, fight it. Fight the urge to lie. Easier said-I know.
Lying creates this wall of insecurities, self-doubt and distrust. All you have at the end of the day is how you have treated someone, so treat them right the first go-round by being honest.
The outcome minus naivety might surprise you. When you live foul or are not being your real true self-the best you, things become distorted, dirty. Example: suppose you were having some friends over for dinner. You lay out the best dinnerware, setting quiet lighting, just right. Adding the perfect flowers which send an inviting aroma understatedly through your living space. Your enthusiasm ignites as you unravel the bags from the local market, preparing a half-vegan, gluten-free, with a special filet mignon for the meat lovers.
Now the sizzle begins. Chop, chop, chop of the onions, garlic, leeks and 'shrooms wafting throughout, competing with the scented bouquets of the dining room and open garden patio. You with me? Obedient romaine dances with carrots, beets, goat cheese and a homemade vinaigrette whispering the same notes of the evening twilight. The doorbell rings, you simultaneously cascade toward the door with a revolving pirouette to rescue your burgeoning baked potatoes, some sweet, some white, from the oven. The orchestrated smatterings of prepared butters begin their ritual over the spuds as everyone hugs, kisses and appreciates the time they have with you and yours over a glass of well-chosen wine, special, for the occasion.
Proudly, you take a moment to step back, mentally high-fiving yourself for the performance of the evening that just took place in this kitchen, you are the MASTER!
Plating everything up, you carefully balance the ginormous tray of dishes dipping the tray to eye level so your guests can prepare themselves to be wowed. Instead, gasps and shrieks. One person storms out, while yet another brushes what seemingly feels like something crawling on them. What is up?
At first glance, everything seems fine, veggies-check, salad-check, meat, check-check. You even whipped up a surprise for dessert so what is the problem?
Maggots begin crawling from underneath every orifice of your display, turning your stomach and sending you and everyone in the room reeling with disgust. This is what a lie looks and feels like. Ugly. Nasty. Revolting. It may seem cute or funny in the beginning but boy does it leave you feeling empty and twisted in the end. Lies have ruined friendships, families and many a business relationship on this planet we call earth.
Is the opposite of wrong, right? Or are you still confused?
In the words of one of my auntie's who has long since passed on:
"Just tell the truth!"